Role Reversal
by Xinthos
Summary: Sometimes the only way to really see reality is to flip it upside down. [OneShot] [Summary Change]
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **I don't know what came over me… was I drunk? I mean… geez. Anyway, whoever figures out whose personality is switched with whose and who is telling the story (the narrator is extremely OOC by the way) gets… a cookie… Some are more obvious than others since I know only some of their personalities in detail… Good luck to anyone who bothers to try.

**Summary:** It's a world where Sasuke is competing with Hinata for Sakura's affection, Shikamaru is enthusiastic about work, Ino is hiding in the bushes, and Neji and Gaara seemed to have had one too many jolly ranchers… One-Shot

**Role Reversal**

I swear it was a normal day; I woke up, brushed my teeth, took a shower, and went outside. The grass was green, the sky was blue, the fish were flying and the birds were swimming… No no, I assure you, I didn't get it wrong. That's just the way things are in Konoha. You see, the birds got tired of being in the air all the time so they made a contract with the fish who learned a knew kind of jutsu to let them breath out of water. Yeah, that's right, Konoha has talking ninja fish.

Anyway, like I was saying, it was a normal day _for Konoha_ when I realized that something was wrong. My shirt was on backwards. But that's not all, I quickly came to the conclusion that I had a bad feeling about today, which is normal for me since I always have bad feelings not that anyone ever bothers to notice. 'No,' they say, 'don't worry about him, he's always creepy like that, nothing to worry about.' Ha! I laugh at them; they don't know me like _I_ know them. Well, I know most of them anyway.

So like I was saying, there I was innocently walking down the street totally _not_ looking through people's windows when I noticed an extremely…_odd_ sight. There was Lee leaning on the railing of the bridge over The River. The letters are capitalized because Konoha only has one river. So there he was, just sitting there not doing anything. Now what's wrong with that you ask? Lee never just sits, he never _just_ does anything, he has to double of that something. So what's up with him today?

"Shouldn't you be training?" I ask him, and he looks moderately surprised, I guess that's because I usually don't talk that much.

"Why bother?" He says, and although extremely alarmed by his answer I continue on my way, sneaking glances at him just to make sure that he is, in fact, Rock Lee.

I chalked up that little experience as just him being sick or something, but what happened next really got me. I mean, _wow_. Sakura's love for Sasuke wasn't a secret, I can tell you, but now I see that I was clearly misinformed… or something. There was definitely something wrong with this conversation - which I was totally _not_ eavesdropping on by the way. It goes as follows:

"Hey Sakura!"

"Hn."

"I was wondering…" The _bashful_ Sasuke dressed in a red shirt and long white shorts began.

"Hn?" Came Sakura's _emotionless_ answer. She was currently dressed in _black_ sweatpants and a black belly shirt.

"Would you… I mean… You want to go out and get something to eat with me?" No. Just no. What the hell? Sasuke was _not_ bashful, did _not_ dress in anything other than black, and most definitely did _not_ ask _Sakura_ out on dates. Just like Sakura was always a bundle of emotions, did not dress in black, and…

"No." Most certainly did not _refuse_ dates from Sasuke.

"Hey Sakura." I said to her, ignoring Sasuke's crushed and hopeless look. She nodded at me.

"You seem… different. Aren't you usually…more emotional?" She looked at me for a second, and I suppose she was surprised that I had said something. I really should start talking more.

"_Emotions_," She spat the word out like venom, "Are a waste of my time. All I care about is killing my aunt, Oprah." Oprah, huh? That sounded awfully familiar, but I didn't comment. "Not that it's any of your business." She added, just to sound more bitter. Now completely and hopelessly confused, I prepared to take my leave to shoot myself in the brain and see if this was a dream when Hinata came running up.

"Sasuke, get away from _my_ Sakura." She shouted. There's _obviously_ something wrong with that sentence. Hinata. Doesn't. Yell. Not only that, she certainly doesn't yell at Sasuke to get away from "her" Sakura. Yeah, something is definitely wrong.

"Y-yours?" I stuttered. Hinata laughed loudly.

"Of _course_ she's mine, I mean, isn't she just totally _hot_?" She questioned, swooning over Sakura who had chosen to ignore everything that was going on.

"Hinata!" Sasuke butted in.

"Well, well, well, if isn't Big Head." Hinata… insulted someone?

"Shut-up Hinata-Pale-Face." I wanted to gag myself upon hearing the insults, but being _me_, I just stood there perfectly calm on the outside.

"You know you can't beat me, Hinata. Sakura _will_ go out with me." Sasuke challenged.

"Now why would she do that when she can have someone as absolutely sexy as me?" Hinata laughed and threw her hair back, at which point I felt myself getting dry heaves from being so absolutely sick with the personality changes. Turning away, I made my way down the street, hoping to avoid anyone else that would seriously impair my mental stability. Today was not my day.

Upon walking down the street, something completely unpredictable, something so incredibly scare happened. I saw Naruto… _not_ moving. He was just standing there in the shadows, eyes focused solely on me. His eyes were full of malice and I tried to ignore them. Still, I could feel his gaze on my back as I walked away… only to run smack dab into Shikamaru. I nodded at him.

"Shikamaru… do you notice anything strange about Naruto?" I asked and looked over to where he was standing. Or _used_ to be standing.

"Sorry Shino for so carelessly bumping into you, and unfortunately I have not seen Naruto lately. For failing you I shall do two hundred one handed push-ups!" And off he went, running at the speed of light past me. I started after him. Wasn't he supposed to be the _lazy_ one? I was about to continue when I heard a voice calling to me.

"Shikamaru!" I looked up to see Kakashi, which was strange because usually he liked to sneak up on people. Why would he be so loud unless…oh no, not him too!

"Have you seen my wonderful pupil anywhere? He took off after I challenged him to a race around the country and now I can't seem to catch up to him."

"…Yeah… he went that way." I said, pointing to where Shikamaru had just run off. Kakashi ran off just as fast as he had, and I continued on my way, taking notice of Gai-sensei up in a nearby tree reading.

The strangeness didn't stop there, I kept on going down that same path, passing by several oddities. First was Kankuro stuffing his face at a restaurant, then there was Jiraiya currently scolding the, fortunately, normal Tsunade. Next was Temari laughing and hanging out near Kiba, who was currently sporting an arrogant smile and leaning (yes, not being super hyper active and actually being still) against a tree. I spotted Tenten not too far off, a confident smirk on her face and I noticed a large fan had been included in her arsenal of weapons. I also saw that Chouji was currently discussing something private with her, and I heard the name Naruto appear quite a few times. I wondered why. Passing the bathhouse, I saw that Shizune was sneaking around the bushes and trying to catch glances of the men or women there. How exactly did I see her there? What I do in my spare time is not really any of your business, now is it? No, no it's not.

Today was the apocalypse, I _knew _it. There was no way this stuff could happen without it being the end of the world. As I neared my house and prepared to try and slap myself out of whatever was going on with me, I witnessed yet _another_ strange sight. Neji, who was running around _laughing _with a _laughing_ Gaara zoomed past me, apparently racing. Neji grinned at Gaara.

"Haha, Gaara! When it comes to speed you could never beat me!"

"Yeah right, Neji! I can do anything better than you!" And off they raced, both laughing and smiling. I vaguely recall a blushing Ino hiding in the shadows, letting out a wistful sigh and a hopeful glance at Gaara. No, that's _it_. Enough is enough.

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!" I screeched so loud I surprised myself and poor Ino who was apparently scared out of her wits by my scream and raced off to a 'safer' place. This was so wrong, so very wrong. I needed to get out of there, I need to pack and leave, I need- I-

Screaming, I sat up so fast I should have gotten whiplash. Looking around, I could feel my blankets rubbing against my sweaty flesh. But… this was my room… It was a dream. All a dream! Yes! Life was still normal – for Konoha, at least. Sighing, I couldn't have been happier. Taking off my glasses to rub my eyes and adjust my view, I took a look out the window and nearly grinned in delight. There was Kiba chasing around Naruto, Kakashi talking with Jiraiya, both with lecherous grins. Shikamaru watching clouds and Gai and Lee doing laps. There was Chouji seemingly making out with a sandwich, Neji training. And all seemed normal, I could hear the cheerful sounds of my friends laughing below my bedroom window. But, wait… was that… Sasuke was laughing? Slowly, I crawled back to bed with a pale face, and vaguely, I recall seeing a bird flying past my window… but now I'm just being stupid, a _flying_ bird? Yeah, right.

**A/N:** …yeah…Sorry for any grammar mistakes, I wrote this in like twenty minutes with only one read-through...


	2. Awards, Answers, and Thanks

Cookie Awards to **Reiyuka Yumikoto** and **causeiambetta**! Yes, it was Shino's POV! Not a lot of people reviewed, and I guess it might be due to the fact that this fic has only been around for one or two days and the plot's not all that stable, but if you look below future guessers can see if they got it right. The switches went as follows:

**Hinata: Ino**

**Naruto: Gaara**

**Shikamaru: Rock Lee**

**Gai: Kakashi**

**Tenten: Temari**

**Sakura: Sasuke**

**Kiba: Neji**

**Shizune: Jiraiya**

**Kankuro: Chouji**

Sorry if I missed anyone, I don't have my list (I had to organize it somehow before I wrote it...) with me at the moment. Thanks to the reviewers and readers, and to those who bothered to guess (even if you didn't post what you were thinking in a review). Thanks again!


End file.
